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Jun 08, 2007

paris hilton ordered back to jail · by Rafi Kam

I wasn’t touching this story but now an absurdly rich person’s world has come crashing down and a public crying fit is involved. So it is sufficiently comedic for my liking.

CNN reports a crying Paris Hilton has been ordered back to jail

Bring on the Schadenfreude!

“It’s not right!” shouted Hilton, who violated her probation in a reckless driving case. “Mom!” she called out to her mother in the audience.

Earlier Friday, the 26-year-old hotel heiress was handcuffed and taken from her home in a black-and-white police car, paparazzi sprinting in pursuit and helicopters broadcasting live from above. She entered the courtroom disheveled and weeping, hair askew, without makeup, wearing a fuzzy gray sweat shirt over slacks.

She cried throughout the hearing, dabbing her eyes, and her body shook constantly. Several times, she turned to her parents, seated behind her in the courtroom, and mouthed, “I love you.”

Edit 6/10 Removing the next few paragraphs because I hadn’t seen the video and from the CNN article there’s no mention that this Jake Byrd stunt was obviously done for laughs/attention.

And in an odd twist the CNN story reveals us another target for even more shameful joy. In 45 days Paris will be out of jail and back to her charmed life but Jake Byrd will still be Jake Byrd.

strong>Fans show up at hearing

Many of Hilton’s several dozen supporters outside the courthouse appeared devastated.

“No! No! No!” screamed Jake Byrd as a court spokesman delivered the news to reporters outside court.

Alas, poor Jake Byrd. And poor Jake Byrd’s parents.

ROFLMAOFS (which stands for ‘ROFLMAO From Schadenfreude’)

Comments for "paris hilton ordered back to jail"

  1. ha! Was (Not Was)
    brilliant!


    — Jay B    Jun 8, 08:54 PM   

  2. “I did have a choice to go to a pay jail,” Hilton said Sunday, without giving details. “But I declined because I feel like the media portrays me in a way that I’m not and that’s why I wanted to go to county, to show that I can do it and I’m going to be treated like everyone else. I’m going to do the time, I’m going to do it the right way.”

    WHEN KEEPING IT REAL GOES WRONG!

    haha!


    — Hashim    Jun 9, 02:09 PM   

  3. Shes kicking that nasty heroine habbit…. Thats what was wrong with that ho… her parents need to let her serve her sentence


    — JANEBLAZZE    Jun 9, 05:07 PM   

  4. This is probably me sucking at reading comprehension, but Jake Byrd is some comedian’s act.


    — hats    Jun 10, 04:31 PM   

  5. hats,

    yeah i realized that when i saw the video coverage.

    i based my comments on cnn’s written coverage of the news which doesnt mention that it’s obviously phony.

    i’ll cross that bit out…


    — Rafi    Jun 10, 04:35 PM   

  6. good talk! the protracted national nightmare is over. here’s my take on the incident.
    http://themaniacsavant.blogspot.com/2007/06/devil-and-paris-hilton-hands-down-most.html


    — badkarma750    Jun 10, 05:57 PM   

  7. blah blah blah paris hilton blah herpes blah stay away from my weiner blah.

    just had to get that out.


    — thoreauly77    Jun 12, 12:18 AM   
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