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2006: Another One Bites The Dust

posted on Jan 15, 2007

Another year older, another year supposedly wiser.

2006 wasn’t a great year for hip-hop but brother Raekwon saith “it is what it is”.

We have some new categories this year and some familiar ones.

As with last year’s recap, we don’t have a best songs of the year category. But you can check some of our 2006 favorites in this mix we posted a few weeks ago.

Also make sure to visit our post wrapping up the best of our own material in 2006.

Ok, without further ado, lets jump right in…..

Top 5 Rap Milfs

  1. Cheryl “Salt” James

    We’ve been fantasizing about her from her bodysuit “Push It” days to her poom-poom shorts stint circa “Shoop” and even in elegant middle-aged motherhood this ‘round the way girl from Queens and female rap pioneer can get it.

  2. Monie Love

    Monie was all Brit-accented class and nubile allure on the remix of “Buddy” in ’89 and managed to make feminism sound sexy on “Ladies First.” Nowadays she is a proud, fine-ass mother who schools capricious new jack Southern rappers on the radio. In other words: bonafide wifey material.

  3. Lin Que

    One of the few cuties to look especially fly with her hair crimped, and bold enough to rock the long-outdated style over fifteen years later. Been diggin’ on this honeydip since she went by the name Isis and rolled with X-Clan.

  4. Ladybug Mecca

    This angelic voiced rhymer and 1/3 of Digable Planets was never too boho, representing lovely for fly educated b-girls worldwide. She can currently be seen outshining today’s glammed-up video vixens/industry jump-offs in Snoop’s video “Candy.”

  5. Shortie No Mas

    Back in the day she got lost in the woods with De La and enticed us randy rakes with reverse psychology by telling we couldn’t knock da boots.

    Without trying to be sexy, this 4’11” tenderoni stays pursuing her rap career and still looks good in a little white dress. Shortie No Mas is heaven to the ears and extra easy on the eyes.

Top 5 Hilariously Bad YouTube Freestyles

Rapper Solja might be just another nonsensical ponytailed space rapper posturing in front of a decently maintained brick wall for effect in his native Canada, but down here in the States his excessive use of bizarre onomatopoeia is the kind of behavior that can get one clapped. OK, maybe not, but your laughter will turn to homicidal rage within thirty seconds of his rhyme.

This kid insists that some barber named Ceasar, presumably the one filming this dreck, is “gay,” but not surprisingly manages to accentuate every aspect of gayness that permeates his whole steez, including his own remarkably gay caesar haircut. If that’s not bad enough, he rhymes over one of the most maligned beats in recent history and attempts to freestyle his way through a phone call. Enjoy.

Alize, bandannas, spliffs, and a Chi-Ali reference? Sounds good in theory but these unwelcome house party guests couldn’t rap their way out of a wet paper bag if they were holding chainsaws and they look about as threatening as your average Boston Public extras.

This appears to be a contest entry of some sort, or so this enterprising young businessman would have you believe. Well, if it’s a contest to see which suburban pubescent mustachioed C-minus student can film a laughably amateurish barely rhyming acapella freestyle while rocking a black wifebeater and a white fitted cap then he’s a shoe-in. Notice how beautifully his ending line fulfills GZA’s “Protekt Ya Neck” prophecies of half-baked notions to blow up scrubs.

Just watch it and enjoy.

Top 5 Battles in Rap’s Civil War

  1. Jeezy vs. Monie Love – Argument On The Radio

    Jeezy Beezy is madsy sadsy because Monie Monie agrees with Nas that hiphop is dead.

    Sure, Nas’s vague, contradictory, mostly irrelevant contentions are barely worth debating but Monie’s mini-ethering of the Snowman makes for great internet.

  2. Dem Franchize Boys “We Fucking Up Hip Hop”

  3. 50 Cent Says Southern Rap Is “Simplified”

    In a nod to Pee-Wee Herman, Southern rap responds “I know you are, but what am I?”

    Young Buck was unavailable for comment.

  4. Nas Outsells Jeezy

    Don’t count your chickens before they hatch Jeezy! Nor your Soundscans before Def Jam buys its share.

  5. Ghostface vs. “Laffy Taffy”

    Whatever happened to “I don’t want niggas soundin’ like me on no album”?

Top 5 10 Shootings (You Should Have Bought Our T-Shirt)

10 because we couldn’t fit them all in a Top 5.

Listed in chronological order. We’re not sick enough to rank them by quality (this year).

  1. Israel Ramirez
  2. Proof
  3. Gravy
  4. Hawk
  5. Philant Johnson
  6. Beanie (allegedly)
  7. Skanbino Mob
  8. Fabolous
  9. Carl Blaze
  10. Papoose on wax “Assassination” of NY Post reporter in “50 Shots”

Honorable Mentions: Jim Jones Concert Shootout, Texas “Rap Battle” Murder, Yo Gotti party shootout, G-Unit BBQ shootout, Dick Cheney shoots his pal in the face

Top 5 Albums We Feel Comfortable Dismissing Without Even Hearing

  1. Remy Ma – There’s Something About Remy

    Just how low do you have to sink to necessitate expulsion from the Terror Squad?

  2. Aceyalone – Magnificent City

    Off-beat, whiny voiced, West Coast underground rapping backed by the man best known for working with MhZ? Remember, you’re only as good as your last hit.

  3. Young Joc – New Joc City

    Two words: Motorcycle Dance.

  4. Lady Sovereign – Public Warning

    Not that we mind, but this girl probably killed any chance of Grime blowing up ever. As if the internet needed another reason to diss British rap.

  5. Lloyd Banks – Rotten Apple

    There’s a reason most crew members only release one solo album.

Top 5 Albums Deleted Within Minutes of Downloading

  1. Lupe Fiasco Food and Liquor – both versions

    He went from Gangsta to Islam to the dick of Kanye West. And then, contrary to popular blogosphere tendency, we sent him straight to the trash bin. Twice. No regrets.

  2. Sadat X – Black October

    Take a hint from Slick Rick: don’t hastily record a subpar record just before doing a bid. You shouldn’t have done it, X.

  3. MF Grimm – American Hunger

    We all felt bad that MF Doom dumped and dissed your crew with minimal explanation as soon as he blew up, but triple disc releases featuring boring production and long-winded rhymes just make it harder to support you, Grimm. Midgets into Crunk indeed.

  4. Outkast – Idlewild

    Even tousled-haired hipsters in smedium tops and girl pants refused to get excited over this quasi-rap “soundtrack” to the duo’s ostentatious movie musical. Informants tell us that half of these songs don’t even appear in the movie.

  5. Mobb Deep – Blood Money

    In 1995, Mobb Deep sounded like 17 year old angels of death from the projects, tortured souls whose anger and frustration at the ghetto life threatened to spill over into murder at any second, barely contained by the nihilism and cold sheen of their beats and rhymes. In 2006 they sounded like Boss Fiddy’s easily disposable flunkies on an episode of Batman.

Top 5 Things We Were Told We Should Check For … But We’re A Little Busy, Okay?

  1. Louis Logic – Misery Loves Comedy
  2. Indie rock (Sacha excluded)
  3. Cam’Ron – Killa Season
  4. HBO’s The Wire
  5. Kidz In The Hall – School Was My Hustle

Top 5 Fast Rap Cuts

  1. Ghostface – “Ghost Is Back”
  2. Chamillionaire “Hip Hop Warning”
  3. Talib Kweli & UGK – “Country Cousins”
  4. Obie Trice “Lay Down”
  5. The Roots feat. Peedi Crack “Long Time”
Honorable Mention: Game rapping over “Know the Ledge”

Top 5 Things We’re Doing Now That Hip Hop Is Dead

  1. Putting our entire collection of rare Queensbridge based rap records up for sale on E-Bay
  2. Growing our hair and beards out and learning to play gee-tar.
  3. Buying some Timberland boots for hiking, now that we won’t get mistaken for disreputable rapper people.
  4. Getting better acquainted with Baltimore House music via Bit Torrents
  5. Refraining from pouring out any of our good liquor on the ground.

Top 5 Signs That Hip Hop is Alive and Well

  1. Audio from upcoming releases by Devin, Raekwon, Monch, etc. have us geeked.
  2. Joell Ortiz is nice as hell!
  3. Saigon gets a radio hit from “Pain In My Life”, an empathetic and earnest song.
  4. NYOIL made the internet go crazy by calling out basically almost everyone
  5. Uh, we got nothing else. Any suggestions for a 5th?

Top 5 Year End Traditions We’d Like to See Die Off

  1. Skillz’ Year End Rap Ups
  2.’s Year End lists
  3. The same token rap albums appearing on every rock critics’ year end list
  4. Big name rappers dropping over-hyped albums just to take advantage of the holiday sales rush
  5. Shark sites copping our snarky style for their year end posts just because we don’t have our act together to drop one before mid-January

Top 5 MC’s Who Should Have Blessed “Crooklyn Dodgers Pt. 3”

Jean Grae, Mos Def, and Memphis Bleek, produced by 9th Wonder? Get the fuck outta here with that ol’ bullshit …

  1. Big Daddy Kane
  2. Jay-Z
  3. Sean Price
  4. AZ
  5. Fabolous

Top Five Free Albums That You Praised Even Though You Dissed Roosevelt Franklin For The Same Marketing Strategy

  1. Talib Kweli and Madlib – Liberation
  2. Dangerdoom EP
  3. Neil Young – Living With War
  4. Chamillionaire – Mixtape Messiah 2
  5. The Are – Uphill Piece of Mind

Top 5 Replacements for No Homo

  1. No Sulu
  2. No Lance Bass (No L.B.)
  3. No Doogie
  4. No Brokeback
  5. No Mark Foley

Honorable Mention: No Mariotti

Top 5 Albums That Make Us Say, “Damn, son, you still make music?”

  1. Bonecrusher – Release The Beast
  2. MC Eiht – Compton’s OG
  3. Dilated Peoples – 20/20
  4. Jurassic 5 – Feedback
  5. 2Pac – Pac’s Life

Top 5 Blog Beefs (keep it on trackback brother)

  1. Bol vs Bun B

  2. Bol vs. Lupe Fiasco

    The wrong jiga to fuck with.

  3. Phonte vs. XXL, “stupid rap fans” and a female mc named Tit-ernia

    “probably the most ironic thing about the whole shit happening was that I’m not even a titty man”

  4. Clyde Smith vs. Kris ex

    Welcome to the Panopticon

  5. Sickamore vs. Combat Jack

    Age wars.

Top 5 Nas “Who Killed It” Apologists

  1. Dick Tracy
  2. Maxwell Smart
  3. The cast of “Newsies”
  4. James Cagney
  5. The crackpot who wrote that dissertation breaking down the lyrics and concept behind the song

Top 5 Movements We Want No Part Of

  1. Aggro druggie pseudo-psycho Caucasoid conspiracy theorist rappers La Coka Nostra.

    Ill Bill put the plutonium in the DeLorean and brought House of Pain and Lordz of Brooklyn back from the 1990s. Together that’s one wacky supergroup but we hear they’ve got white kids going ga-ga.

  2. Kidz Rap Radio

    Buy it at Amazon!

  3. Nerdcore Rap

  4. Fergie

    Take a bath, woman!

  5. Rap battle videos where one guy gets knocked the fuck out

    In a just world, “Bodega” would be doing “Stylin on You” numbers.

Top 5 Events of 2006

  1. Watching you, watching me

    The all-seeing eye has arrived and it turns out we’re our own Big Brother (well given the governments abuses of privacy, lets say we’re our own other Big Brother).

    From Michael Richard’s breakdown to Saddam’s hanging to a whole lot of celebrity vagina, amateur video made a lot of news this year. Captured today, worldwide tomorrow. Fitting then that event 2 is…..

  2. YouTube sold to Google for nearly 2 billion dollars

    Somehow the French wunderkinder behind Crips vs Blood don’t see a penny of it.

  3. Stephen Colbert rips into the president and the press while they squirm at the White House Correspondents Dinner

    High-five! Were the past 6 years worth it for those 20 brilliant minutes? Not quite.

  4. The Democrats kick butt and take names in the mid-term elections

    Which indicates that public disapproval of the war in Iraq has grown at a rate exceeding conservative election-fixing ingenuity.

  5. Steely Dan have beef with Owen Wilson

    Sorry, it was a slow news year.

Top 5 Reissues of the Year

  1. Kool G Rap & DJ Polo – Road to Riches (2 CD)
  2. MF Doom – Special Herbs: The Box Set
  3. Various Artists – Big Apple Rappin
  4. Boogie Down Productions - The Best Of The B Boy Sessions: Blast Master Tapes
  5. Scientifik – Criminal

Top 10 Albums of 2006

  1. The Roots – Game Theory
  2. Clipse – Hell Hath No Fury
  3. Ghostface Killah – Fishscale
  4. AZ – The Format
  5. Game – The Doctor’s Advocate
  6. Trae – Restless
  7. Ghostface – More Fish
  8. E-40 – Ghetto Report Card
  9. Juggaknots – Use Your Confusion
  10. K-Def – Willie Boo Boo: The Fool

Back to features

Comments for "2006: Another One Bites The Dust"

  1. oh man. really laughed hard at this shit.

    arlene    Jan 15, 03:18 PM   
  2. I refuse to believe that a new year has begun until Oh Word’s rap up drops.

    Now that you have issued your oft imitated, never duplicated mega-list I feel free to openly attack the internets with verve and zeal.

    It is so on this year Oh Word family, so on.

    Billy Sunday    Jan 15, 04:33 PM   
  3. btw, Lin Que is like my sister.

    so be eeeeeeasy.

    Billy Sunday    Jan 15, 04:36 PM   
  4. Y’all didn’t have time to watch “THE WIRE?!”

    I don’t think I can even fuck with y’all anymore.

    Excellent blog, though!

    Ron Mexico    Jan 15, 05:09 PM   
  5. Some great stuff, some stuff I wonder at, but all in all a nice wrap up. And on that note, Steely Dan’s beef with the Wilsons = joke.

    Train    Jan 15, 06:57 PM   
  6. Whoo! Good stuff. I thought I was the only one that liked that Juggaknots album.

    Reggie    Jan 15, 08:18 PM   
  7. 5/5 on Lemmings picture alone

    Req-mega    Jan 15, 08:52 PM   
  8. The last freestyle might be the funniest thing I’ve ever seen on the Internet. This is all just fantastic. Next level shit guys.

    Jeff    Jan 15, 09:15 PM   
  9. nice. don’t know where to start so I’ll leave it at that.


    Vik    Jan 16, 12:07 AM   
  10. Beautiful, guys. I had been waiting months for this.

    floodwatch    Jan 16, 09:12 AM   
  11. Yo, you out of line for dissing The Wire and Food and Liquor.

    This was some mad funny ish though.

    P-Matik    Jan 16, 01:40 PM   
  12. Wasn’t a diss, we just haven’t gotten to checking it yet (hence the top 5). The first season is on my HD and will be watched.

    I’m also checking that Louis Logic record.

    Sach    Jan 16, 02:01 PM   
  13. Um, no offense, but that Lin Que is lesbo as all fuck!! To add insult to injury, she look’s like a mean HARD ass dyke. Um No offense. Real talk, when wifey and I lived on 7th ave, and Lincoln Place (park slope), Lin Que used to hang around the neighborhood (with MC Lyte) and whenever Lyte wasn’t around, LQ would step mad forceful like to wifey, almost to the point that I felt compelled to either a) step to her on some “Yo, leave my piece the eff alone” or b) roll up on Lyte and snitch her bitch out! Real talk! Great effin list!

    Combat Jack    Jan 16, 02:27 PM   
  14. why is “country cousins” fast rap? it’s a great song but shits like 70bpm.

    noz    Jan 16, 03:04 PM   
  15. yeah but they rap in double time…

    Rafi    Jan 16, 03:37 PM   
  16. j.j. brown’s production is the only aspect of “misery loves comedy” that works. not only is louis logic an annoying fool, he’s also a bad singer, which he feels the need to do on almost every track. the lyrical content ranges from childish rants on life, to his dick gettin’ slobbed on the r-e-g. come to think of it, i’m surprised eastern conference hasn’t signed this dude.

    wasn’t kmd’s “mr. hood” reissued this year?

    d-luv    Jan 16, 05:10 PM   
  17. Yeah I really didn’t like the few tracks I heard off the Louis Logic.

    KMD’s Mr Hood was indeed reissued and could probably also sit up there on the top 5 (though I can’t speak on the quality of the sound or packaging).

    One qualm though is, from the track list I saw, it lacked the Nitty Gritty remix that the CD-R HHI reissue of Mr. Hood from a few years back had added on to the original.

    And the Nitty Gritty remix is awesome.

    That is all.

    Rafi    Jan 16, 05:36 PM   
  18. “yeah but they rap in double time…”

    big daddy kane did not rap in “double time.”

    noz    Jan 16, 07:48 PM   
  19. reissue of slum village’s fantastic vol. 1 too.

    David    Jan 16, 07:51 PM   
  20. real talk by trae has to be the best fast rap song of 2006.

    iggy    Jan 16, 09:41 PM   
  21. excellent work

    sankofa    Jan 16, 09:51 PM   
  22. “Yeah I really didn’t like the few tracks I heard off the Louis Logic.”

    His earlier shit is a hell of a lot better. Misery Loves Comedy was…boring. Good production though.

    Train    Jan 16, 11:17 PM   
  23. The problem with Misery Loves Comedy is that he limited his options by rejecting battle stuff in favor of relationship tracks…He could have cut half of those and we would have still gotten the point. As it is, he came off a bit too Slug-ish for my tastes.

    Unique emcee, but bad direction this go around.

    Sach    Jan 17, 02:34 AM   
  24. I enjoyed the hell out of this.

    1.) “Long Time Coming” is my favorite song of the ones yall label fast rap, but I don’t think it’s fast rap. Plus, Ghost’s “Charlie Brown” is better than “Ghost is Back.”

    2.) I thought yall were joking about La Coka Nostra. White dudes who wear du-rags for no reason—meet your new heroes.

    3.) Also, I call bullshit on Fabolous on Crooklyn Dodgers. Dude is straight anus. I didn’t even bother listening to Mos’ last 2 albums, but he is certainly a better choice than Fabolous.

    eauhellzgnaw    Jan 17, 02:39 AM   
  25. is so damn dead.

    MF Doom box set is fuego.

    And you need the Wire in your brain ASAP.

    Start Snitching    Jan 17, 03:15 AM   
  26. Please stop the “real talk” trend before it gets started, before Kelly Ripa uses the phrase on air.

    Gandalf Mantooth    Jan 17, 12:39 PM   
  27. Damn, “Magnificent City” deserves to go out better than that. Aceyalone = whiny West coast rapper? In the words of that Cryme Tyme announcer, YOU MUST BE STRAIGHT TRIPPIN’.

    DJ Flash    Jan 17, 05:45 PM   
  28. Deserve ’s got nothing to do with it.

    Rafi    Jan 17, 06:09 PM   
  29. Aceyalone isn’t bad, hell, I even like RJD2, but Magnificent City was one of the most generic, boring albums I’ve heard in quite some time…only way to make it more bland would be to add in Styles of Beyond or Dilated Peoples.

    And Sach, have you heard Sin-A-Matic? He goes with more battle and concept songs (with only a couple being about women) than on MLC…just a more entertaining album overall.

    Train    Jan 17, 11:20 PM   
  30. Dilated Peoples is bland? Oh well, it’s a big world, everybody’s got to love or hate something.

    DJ Flash    Jan 18, 08:03 AM   
  31. you are a good blogger homey. ain’t one of you from danbury?

    dcfist    Jan 18, 11:42 AM   
  32. Thanks.

    I’m not from Danbury but I lived there for 6 years.

    Rafi    Jan 18, 11:48 AM   
  33. danbury graf changed my life. your blog, well, not so much. but it makes work more fun, and I don’t have to read byron crawfish anymore.

    dcfist    Jan 18, 05:00 PM   
  34. oh. dj flash. Dialated has been bland since they came out…

    dcfist    Jan 18, 05:01 PM   
  35. People say Guru’s bland too. Might as well just let this one slide on out because I’m just here to enjoy Rafi’s dope site.

    DJ Flash    Jan 19, 04:27 AM   
  36. They say it caus guru is bland! Bahamadia, Evidence and him should have a band called wheat thins.

    dcfist    Jan 19, 01:04 PM   
  37. You’re diggiby diggiby dumb when I’m thucking my thumb.

    nesta    Jan 20, 02:31 AM   
  38. You can easily make a case for Guru being bland, because of his emotionless/monotone delivery, but the guy’s message coupled with Premier’s production make Gang Starr something more. Without Premier, though, Guru just isn’t the same.

    Train    Jan 20, 11:53 PM   
  39. Top 5 Year End Traditions We’d Like to See Die Off…...’s Year End lists
    this really needed to be said

    boycott MTV    Jan 22, 08:29 PM   
  40. Both YE reviews are interesting & neither is perfect, but [insert pick random “beat down” word here – sons, ethers, Schiavos]

    NoMamesBuey    Feb 2, 06:43 AM   
  41. Too bad the “Crips vs Blood” video is a dead link, these stupid kids were hilarious ! Anyone saved this ? Cheers.

    Arthur    Feb 8, 07:12 AM   
  42. Got damn. I’ve been sleeping {no narcoleptic}. My bad rafi.

    911    Mar 17, 01:00 AM   
  43. this shit was corny

    — rat worship    Mar 20, 12:15 AM   
  44. Not that we mind, but this girl probably killed any chance of Grime blowing up ever. As if the internet needed another reason to diss British rap.

    ^^So true, grime is a crime on behalf of the British youth. But British rap has got some fire for that ass, see Roots Manuva, Black Twang, Klashnekoff, Sway Dasofo.

    Good post but you postin your end of year wrap up in March????????? Tsh…smh…...a lot…..

    EnglandRepresent    Mar 20, 01:17 AM   
  45. “posted on Jan 15, 2007”

    it only resurfaced in the “recently commented on” sidebar.

    Rafi    Mar 20, 01:27 AM   
  46. man, that pic of weezy and his “daddy” engaged in a kissed is PRICELESS!! probably the most ridiculous thing a rapper has ever done, hands down. fuckouttahere with that shit! mob shit my ass dunny!

    sooch    Mar 28, 05:46 PM   
  47. yo what the fuck are juggalos doing anywhere near this site?!
    what the fuck is wrong with you people??!!
    you had me at the wu-tang vs peanuts, and great content over all, but juggaknots?! fuck!

    juanvsshark    Dec 7, 06:22 PM   
  48. juan,

    what the fuck are you talking about? juggaknots has nothing to do with icp / juggalos.

    juggaknots = classic nyc underground. you may know them from scene stealing guest-work on company flow and prince paul’s prince among thieves.

    they put out a dope, slept-on album in 06.

    rafi    Dec 7, 06:35 PM   
  49. That’s Lin Que’s actual hair texture. Not crimped. :)

    — evo    Sep 6, 12:05 AM